Marriage outside the Church?
By Joshua R. LeBlanc • Oct 12th, 2007 • Category: Church LifeWith regards to marriage of a Catholic who is marrying outside the Church, It is held that it is not licit for a Catholic to attend such functions. First of all, why would you want to attend an event that is a lie and really and truly a simulation of a sacrament. In my eyes, it would be no different than attending a pseudo-Mass of someone who wasn't really ordained but thought they were. Anyway, recently I have heard some priests who give the advice that in situations like this one should not attend the wedding, but its OK to attend the reception to keep family ties. I may be off here but for the life of me I cannot understand this advice. How does it logically follow that since you cannot attend an invalid marriage ceremony that it is then OK to attend the reception, an event that rejoices and congratulates the couple on their invalid marriage? This sort of logic just doesn't follow.
Joshua R. LeBlanc is Joshua is the co-founder and president of cyberCatholics.com , a 100% Catholic webhosting service. Joshua is also the founder of DefendingCatholicTruth.com, a site dedicated to explaining the Catholic faith by providing solid Catholic resources to those searching for the Truth of Jesus Christ and His Church. You can read more about Josh by reading his biography.
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I knew a gentleman who refused not only NOT attend the wedding of his “daddy’s little girl”, but also refused to attend the wedding reception. She got married in the mormon “religion”, and he definitely didn’t let that ( her being daddy’s little girl ) stop him from NOT attending. Unfortunately my, what I thought was my mother-inlaw ( Church annulment )was the sister of that gentleman, and boy she ( she tries to be Roman Catholic, for being a widow and having pagan children is difficult ) didn’t hear the end of it from his wife.
I have been searching for commentary on annulments and came across your entry. The response was very similar to what my fiancé and I are experiencing with our annulment process – an impersonal attitude to a very personal situation.
I realize your entry is not necessarily related to annulments but it does hint a bit of the arrogance and insensitivity we experience in the process.
I recently read an article, Talkin’ ‘Bout My Generation, in Envoy Magazine Vol. 7.5 by Fr. Brian Wilson, L.C. who elaborated on the subject of Marriage Outside the Church subject. I noticed a recent catholicunderground.com podcast episode referenced the recently republished Envoy magazine so I ordered a free trial.
Anyway, Fr. Wilson summarized that, “attending your friend’s wedding is really the Christian thing to do. Otherwise your would end up with the rather absurd situation that it would be more meritorious to go to a football game while your best friend was getting married, than to accompany him in a context not merely of Christian prayer, but of sacramental celebration.”
As my fiancé and I try to work back into union with the Church I thought the comments by Fr. Wilson were a good balance to your otherwise very literal statements about situations that are not strictly in union with the Catholic Church.